“The Morning After Memoirs” by Kate Michaels
Blurb: A smart, candid slant on the world of dating, Kate Michaels’ sexy, laugh-out-loud debut novel reimagines the world of Sex And The City with the biting realism of Lena Dunham’s Girls.
Twenty-nine-year-old Jess wakes up on New Year’s Day a touch hungover and a whole lot confused. The man in bed next to her is not her boyfriend, Ben. In fact, she doesn’t even remember Not-Ben’s name. It won’t be the first time she finds herself in a questionable situation in a year that proves her new single-in-the-city lifestyle is far from the glamorous, Sex And The City world she’s been promised on TV. Between hacking through last year’s leg hair, accidentally snogging someone who may well be her cousin, getting hit over the head with a sex toy that isn’t even hers, and ending the night with a walk of shame into her parent’s garage, Jess’s single life is turning out more cockroaches than cocktails.
The Morning After Memoirs is the story of one woman’s search for love, meaning, and a low-calorie alternative to wine.
By the time my Set Menu For 2 (don’t judge me) arrived, I’d already started feeling the food guilt. I was about to rack up an extreme diet fail and I wasn’t sure if my self-esteem could cope with the Kung-pow comedown. I discarded it heartlessly on the sideboard and headed to the lounge to find something more productive to do. Rifling through my (mostly unwanted) Christmas presents I discovered a retro-style step aerobics set – it was the latest in a long line of gifts I’d requested in anticipation of a fabulous new me. Last year it had been a Piloxing (yes, Pilates mixed with boxing) DVD and the year before that an exercise ball, which had actually stopped me exercising for two months with a sprained ankle after I tried to walk on it like I was in the circus. The step came ready assembled, so I manoeuvred it onto the floor in front of the TV and sat on its (surprisingly comfortable) top while I forced the DVD into the player. Within ten minutes I was hooked, watching a crazed blonde jump around like Energizer bunny’s bubbly second wife – all the while sitting comfortably on my new step, devouring my second main course…
Exercise has never really been my thing. Well, not since turning 13 at any rate. Until then I’d been the perfect little athlete, joining every team on offer and wowing the parents (OK, my parents) on sports day by being what I would be described on my report cards for years to come as ‘a good all-rounder’. While my folks were encouraged by their daughter’s ability to turn her hand to any subject thrown her way, I was aware from an early age the dark truth behind that backhanded compliment. I was destined to be ‘good’ at most things, but I had a sneaking suspicion I was ‘great’ at absolutely nothing. Still, I rushed around in an obscenely short gym skirt, like a slightly dumpy version of a Japanese businessman’s fantasy, full of energy and the joys of life. From the ages of 13 to 29 I had moved very little.
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**About author, Kate Michaels: Kate Michaels was born in Birmingham. After studying English, drama and film, she moved to London where she currently lives with her boyfriend and two cats. As a journalist and copywriter she writes about everything from bars and theatre to luxury property. The Morning After Memoirs is Kate’s debut novel.
**Contact Katie: Twitter