Chick Lit Goddess

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October Guest Blogger: Janet Eve Josselyn

Why I Hate Halloween

There’s a lot to like about Halloween if you like candy, gore, sexy nurses and death. But I’m not a big fan of the Halloween tradition.

I love seeing the costumes, though, especially on toddlers. Who doesn’t like a toddler dressed as a lion or a cop? You don’t get to see that any other time of the year.

But there are way too many sexy nurses, sexy princesses, sexy Miley Cyrus’s, sexy teachers and just plain sexy teenage girls. The boys, on the other hand, tend to favor costumes that would be accompanied by a fair amount of weaponry. As the mother of a boy, I can attest to the male desire to wield a weapon or two and Halloween is one of the few days out of the year when that’s considered normal, out in public.

By far the most popular costumes every year are the ones featuring blood, guts, gore and death. Bare skulls, arrows going through heads, swords going through bodies, axes dripping in fake blood – it’s all so hideous and creepy and violent. I do like the ghosts, though. The little toddler ghosts.

I’m not a fan of candy either but I hand it out with wild abandon on Halloween. Nobody wants to be given an apple or a box of dried out raisins on Halloween. I don’t want to end up with a bowl of candy sitting in my kitchen so if you come to my house around 9:00 in the evening, I will invert the bowl into your bag and then turn out all of the outside lights and be done with it for another year.

Possibly the most objectionable part of Halloween, however, is the underlying message that if you don’t cough up the treats something bad will happen to your house and it may involve toilet paper. Toilet paper clinging to your tree branches will take forever to blow off, especially if it rains. So it’s basically extortion and the price is candy.

I guess it could be worse!

About the author: Janet Eve Josselyn is a graduate of Colby College, Harvard Graduate School of Design and Boston College Law School. She is a blogger for The Huffington Post and has published one novel, Thin Rich Bitches. She enjoys collecting advanced degrees and not using the knowledge for monetary gain. To her credit, she is remarkably optimistic despite her obvious shortcomings and lack of talent.

Contact Janet: Facebook Twitter

 

 

Janet Eve Josselyn

Author Bio: Janet Eve Josselyn graduated from Colby College, Harvard University Graduate School of Design, and Boston College Law School.  She toiled for years as a litigator in Boston at a law firm that is no longer still in business.  Prior to her meteoric rise in the law, Janet worked as an architect in Boston, designing some pretty hideous buildings that have probably been torn down by now.  She has published one novel, Thin Rich Bitches, and has written numerous articles for publications in the US (including MORE Magazine) and in the UK (including People of Few Words).  Janet, her husband, son, and large black dog currently reside in an unnamed suburb of Boston where she will be able to count her friends on one hand soon after publication of Thin Rich Bitches.

Five Reasons Why Reading Chick-Lit Can Make You Look Younger and Thinner

One thing that diet pill manufacturers don’t want you to know is that reading chick-lit can make you look younger and thinner for a lot less money.  With your nose buried in a good chick-lit book, you won’t be making any new wrinkles worrying about your narcissistic boss, your child’s pathetic math grade or the husband’s penchant for not flushing the toilet.  And there is no need to be scared reading a litany of horrific descriptions of bodily functions that could cease if you indulge in the product.  Just read, and enjoy.  No need to call 9-1-1 because you are unable to breathe or speak.  Like that would do any good anyway, if you are unable to breathe or speak.  That is about as funny as the lawyers for the diet pill companies ever get.

Secondly, you can feel real, guilt-free joy when the fictional narcissistic boyfriend contracts something yucky after engaging in a frolic with a woman who is not his girlfriend.  Not only is that wanton woman a real piece of (fictional) work, but we can afflict her with any nasty personal habit we want to at the drop of a hat if we are the author.  And we can also remind the boyfriend about the consequences of behaving like a fictional bad boy.  So much fun!  Fictional stuff can’t run afoul of any state or federal laws, so the guilt-free joy really is anxiety-free and thus wrinkle-free.

Thirdly, reading chick-lit can make you look younger and thinner because if you are parked on the sofa or curled-up on the bed reading chick-lit, you are not exposing your skin to the harmful rays of the sun. No need to debate the merits of SPF 30 versus SPF 100.  That’s a no-brainer.

Reading chick-lit is also satisfying and calorie-free (unless you dragged the giant bag of M&M’s that you bought from Costco (allegedly for the husband) to the sofa to enjoy as you read the chick-lit)).

Lastly, if you are reading chick-lit, most likely you are not driving the husband’s car and ignoring the flashing oil light moments before seizing the engine which is very loud and smoky and stressful and expensive and pisses the husband off, causing stress and angst and wrinkles and other stuff that definitely ages a wife.  Trust me on that one . . . . . !

**Contact Janet:

Send a message or post a comment on her Facebook page!

Email her at: janetjosselyn100@gmail.com

**Click HERE to read my review of “Thin Rich Bitches”

Thin Rich Bitches

Book review of “Thin Rich Bitches”

“Thin Rich Bitches”

Pippin Snowe’s husband cheated on her, so she’s decide to move to dilapidated farmhouse with her young son.  She gets a job, renovating kitchens for very wealthy women, and even being told to park her car with “the help” does.  When she realizes she wants a change (what’s one more, right?), she opens a country club for dogs, coming full circle in her life!

When I was approached by the author to review her book, Thin Rich Bitches, the title had Chick Lit written all over it, so I gladly accepted.  From the first page to the last, I was hooked on this book!  Through all of its twists and turns, it kept my interested and rooting for Pippin!  It was very funny and uplifting, and the characters were enjoyable.  While I couldn’t relate to Pippin’s situation of a cheating husband and a mother, I enjoyed her and admired here for her positive attitude.  There was a little too much design talk, but it was very well explained and needed.  (I would love to say more, but I don’t want to spoil — read the book yourself!)  The author’s writing also has to be commended!  She has a true gift!

I give this book 4 out of 5 stars!

**Click HERE to read a guest post by the author!